Why Are Libras So Hot?
Libra hotness, at a glance
There’s a line in The Great Gatsby that says: “She laughed again, as if she said something very witty, and held my hand for a moment, looking up into my face, promising that there was no one in the world she so much wanted to see. That was a way she had.” That’s Libra.
Libras have a unique way of making everyone feel special, important, wanted, and seen. They pay attention, ask questions, and show you that they’re really listening. Libras are desirable in part because they remind you of your own desirability. They give out compliments freely and share their feelings for their lovers openly. They are finely attuned to the needs, desires, and identities of other people – a quality that appeals to the most basic need for love, connection and belonging innate to every human being.
Libras focus on making others comfortable with friendliness and politeness (especially earlier in life) and always keeping conversations flowing, maintaining eye contact, appearing absolutely enraptured with what their conversational partner has to say, while somehow still managing to keep the effort of it all undetectable.
To be with a Libra is to be welcomed into the home of love, sex, pleasure, desire, creation, and unity; they are the domicile of Venus. The start of Libra season coincides with an equinox (autumn in the Northern Hemisphere; spring in the Southern Hemisphere) – a day of equal dark and light, mirrored in Libra’s symbol, the Scales. They are black-and-white contrasts of people, uniting all inner and outer conflicts in the name of wholeness, turning polar opposites into balanced complements, holding one hand in your light and one in your dark. We can be so many things at once, we’re each a full deck of cards and more, and Libra understands that.
Libra is a cardinal sign and cardinal signs are about taking in a breath of fresh air – they occur at the beginning of a season and represent the initiation of something. Libras initiate (cardinal) connection (air/Venus). Libra energy feels like a big inhale, a breath of fresh air. Libras want to feel inspired and alive, all blood and honey (follow the link to a song by a Libra), like the way that it feels to stand at the threshold of something new and unimaginably beautiful.
Libra Attraction, Dating, and Desire
The Third Eye Blind song “Semi-Charmed Life” feels like being with a Libra. That kind of aliveness, the pure entwinement of joy and sadness, togetherness, devoted attention and “[never] listening when you say goodbye.” Smiling, living, golden. Awakened by each other’s energy. Dionysian depravity inside of a glittering aura. Oral sex given so purely. “Her own motivation.” “The sky was gold, it was rose,” and “I speak to you like the chorus to the verse.” A cinnamon wind, an iris magnetism, velvet dresses and smiling on city streets. Stephan Jenkins of Third Eye Blind is a Libra.
Libras see you. They are prismatically multidimensional and they recognize and revere the natural dimension in others without ever being weighed down by it, and that awareness of others is part of what makes them so magnetically attractive and intoxicatingly seductive. They are enchanting in the attention they pay, in the way that they understand, and in how much they delight in crawling inside of someone else to see things from their perspective; there are few thrills as intense as feeling seen and appreciated like that.
Libras are equal parts bright and shadowy, sexually experimental, and they take pleasure in getting their hands in your light and your dark. Libras have an insatiable desire to get closer, they are turned on by feeling deeply and genuinely understood, and they feel madly alive in states of connection and desire, effortlessly awakening the same desirous revelry in others. They give as much as they take; they listen as much as they speak; they know that balance is an action. That kind of reciprocity is essential to chemistry.
The symbol for Venus is shaped like a hand mirror – a symbol oft ascribed to the supposedly shallow and emptily vain nature of Libra (a quality rarely present in actual, real-life Libras over the age of 16). In reality, Libras use aesthetics as a way to make life more pleasurable and to express the seemingly inexpressible inner self. But that mirror always rests in a Libra’s hand: Libras understand the power of a mirror. At their best and most alluring, Libras turn that mirror inward for introspection, and outward to say, “Yes, that’s you! I see you. You are understood.” They are intent on showing you yourself. Libras are attracted to people who know and freely express themselves, and in stark contrast to popular opinion, Libras love who a person is, while simultaneously seeing potential, like Venus in the sky signifying the coming return of the sun. Two things at once. Venus, Libra’s ruling planet, is the brightest “star” in the sky, visible only just after sundown or just before dawn – Libra burns hot in the blackness and tempts others to experiment with their own dark and light.
Libras–especially Libras in love and lust–are connection and unity personified. Libra is “romantic,” yes, but romance is not what we have been told it is. Catherine Breillait, a Libra moon, perhaps described Libran ‘romance’ best when she said:
“I am eternally, devastatingly romantic, and I thought people would see it because 'romantic' doesn't mean 'sugary. ' It's dark and tormented — the furor of passion, the despair of an idealism that you can't attain.”
To be a romantic is not to drown a lover in pink sugar and rose petals, but to linger in the fertile space between one’s own mouth and someone else's, letting attunement to and desire for one another build and swell. Libras feel the space between you and me like a weight, a heavy, leaden magnetism, and they fully enjoy the process of closing that gap, melting all egoic lines between us. Libras have an insatiable desire to get closer, and the real trick is to still retain the self in that closeness. As Helene Cixous put it, “The person we love we dream only of eating. [...] loving is wanting and being able to eat up and yet stop at the boundary. [...] I beg you, eat me up. Want me down to the marrow. And yet manage it so as to keep me alive.” Libras love and fuck their lovers down to that last line of division, stopping only at the bone, in attempt to satiate the insatiable desire to get closer, and that is next-level hot. Being with a Libra feels like wrapping one’s legs around the divine that lives inside of them and letting it swallow us… or vice versa. The trick is to come out of that oblivion still whole, consuming each other but still stopping at the appropriate boundary. Lovers that understand that are the ones that Libras thrive with long-term.
Again, Libras are turned on by feeling deeply and genuinely understood. Start listening and pay close attention. They want want to be known, and to be seen and embraced too. Libra is a sign of bringing together, using the unifying power of Venus to take all the little parts of their lovers and bring them together. They can even bring multiple lovers together, in the right situations; Libras can find common ground between any two parties. We feel safe when we’re around Libras, like we can enjoy the most wholesome lights and find hidden pleasure in the shadows too.
Libras seduce their lovers through a kaleidoscope of created and curated art – music (and playlists), poetry, film, visual art, quotes, whatever mediums they have access to. Libras are into presence, ethics, kindness, intelligence, genuine care, philosophical conversations, soul-deep recognition, sharing art, and playful flirtation. Libras are Venusian, yes, but they’re also air signs: the words gotta flow ”like the chorus to the verse,” and the mind must be invigorated and kept ever-present. It’s really fucking attractive to feel someone want to just enjoy life with you so much.
When a Libra gets tangled up in a romantic mirage, they quickly begin to feel disgusted–not further enamored–with the person, sometimes struggling to recognize where their disgust is coming from. But when a Libra is truly enamored of you (keyword: truly), their attention is undivided. No, they do not always have one eye on the door; When a Libra is in, they are in, and that “in-ness” feels like sex magic. Libra is the sign in which Saturn exalts: Libras know well the weight and significance of commitment. Libras can connect with anyone, but commitment to that connection is an exalted honor. Love and sex aren’t only the pleasures of Venus, but the weight, responsibility, and protection of Saturn too. This doesn’t necessarily mean that Libras are exclusively monogamous (plenty aren’t), they just tend to take their relationships seriously. They mean something.
Libra Sex (and kink)
Libra is a seductive temple of love in which sex is a natural extension of connection and another way to share the honey of Venus. Libras create sacred space where their lovers are witnessed and embraced as whole, and where we can all swim together, unarmed, in love or desire, pouring it down each other’s throats and playing with the boundaries of ‘you’ and ‘me.’ Truly ignited by desire, multi-dimensional beauty, and connection, Libra’s seductive power flows from them unnoticed, drawing the shiny red apple of your desire into the palm of their hand as if by magic.
Libras are willing to experiment sexually, and above all else, this is a sign that likes the passion of the build-up. All air signs like the build-up before active consummation, but Libra in particular brings electricity to that space between my mouth and yours. They are extremely attuned to the needs of an individual and have big switch energy, able to fit into different places depending on the energy of the moment or the relationship. It’s worth mentioning, too, that Libra is associated with the lower back and butt — find out if the Libra you’re into wants some extra attention paid to those areas. 😉
As the sign in which the sun falls, Libras can have a lot of anxiety around identity and whether or not they’re being seen as the person that they are (sun-related things!). Libras like to find unique ways to express the self, like through creative mediums and kink. And as the exalted home of Saturn, many Libras are turned on by the concept of permission (both giving it and receiving it, literally and non-literally), bondage and discipline (all three are Saturn things). Libras understand that another person’s adoration, love, or arousal can give us permission to be exactly who we are, at long last. Libras are kinky because through kink we all get to be adored, rather than condemned, for our dimension and difference. Libras want play with your and their many selves, many faces, and the infinitely blooming and metamorphosing rosette of human desire.
Venus’ rose-shaped orbit
Libras sometimes like to play where pleasure (Venus) meets its absence (Saturn), bringing pleasure into pain and vice versa, and especially where permission and control (Saturn) become erotic and aphrodisical (Venus). Tease, playing with restraint, and things that feel ‘forbidden’ are Libran thrills, and there is no time limit on sex with a Libra. There is no one peak of pleasure and orgasms are infinite. There is no goal but pleasure for the sake of pleasure and connection. There is no post-sex drop because there is no ‘before sex’ and ‘after sex’, just the energy between us that continues to flow ad infinitum.
In the same way, for Libras, sexuality is not something that exists in a vacuum: sex is part of a mosaic of politics and ethics that must be acknowledged and explored. The way that Libras love to play with those politics and contort society’s expectations and pre-written roles in bed is ultra-hot. They love to play both sides, flip preconceived identities on their heads (they are the fall of the sun, after all — identity is not static), and break out of any objectifying, dehumanizing role they’re put into, often by switching to the other extreme — something that’s especially delicious to experience sexually. Libras are at their hottest, hands down, when they suddenly free themselves from self-containment and from the confines of what the world around them says they “should” be, and loosen into their full dimension.
A Libra will lay you down (…or tie you up… or ask to be tied up…) and tongue-fuck you into another dimension, always taking their pleasure and yours ultra-seriously. They take their commitments equally seriously. Libras care deeply and they understand that attraction, love and devotion go hand-in-hand-in-hand.
Libras are truly ‘indecisive’ on only two occasions: when they are disconnected from themselves, and when none of the options are up to snuff. If your Libra love interest doesn’t know what they want, tell them what you want first; it’s like you’re giving them the gift of permission to want, something they desperately need. A sudden realization is likely to follow.
Libras understand not just the joy of airy, balanced communication, mutual validation arising from deep, empathic understanding and the illumination of the symmetry between two people (“I have had this experience too; we are both real!”), and the most exalted carnal pleasures; but also the gravity and weight of choice, commitment, love, and sex. Libra is where the velvet of the petals (Venus) meets the sobriety of the thorns (Saturn); there is gravity to the Libran experience of Venus. A Libra’s love doesn’t die easily, contrary to popular opinion. It’s built to last.
For Libras, desire and sex and love are about the whole person. Let ‘em see you and let ‘em know that you see them, and that you take them seriously. The temple blooms.